The irony of coupledom: all the many ways and instances in which the existence of the mate actually stands in the way of you getting the love, sex and emotional sustenance you need that they’re supposed to be providing, and the other person’s feeling that you similarly thwart his/her need-gratification by virtue of having your own separate existence, rather than simply being a convenient delivery-system for love, sex and emotional sustenance, as they had secretly (or not so secretly) hoped.
Yesterday we had a fight about whether I’d been dismissive about him saying his feelings had been hurt by my dismissing his feelings during a previous fight, and whether his being angry at me about it meant that I was obligated to put aside my own feelings on the subject to consider his feelings on the subject, and whether, if I couldn’t do that, I was guilty of dismissing his feelings (once again). He wouldn’t fucking shut up about it. If I get peeved because he’s angry at me about some stupid thing, I’ve hurt his feelings. No, worse – I’m denying his feelings about whatever non-event he has so many feelings about.
Could Laura Kipnis' brain be more delicious and subversive? I don't think so. Read the rest.
